Healthy Tips for Managing Trauma so You Can Live in the True Self [Episode #664]

Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational or educational purposes only, and does not substitute professional medical advice or consultations with healthcare professionals. Please seek professional help if it’s warranted.

This week’s topic is: Healthy Tips for Managing Trauma so You Can Live in the True Self

I’ve been delving into this topic for the past few years, and on today’s show I want to share ways that I’ve been able to move through unhealthy patterns in my life and how you can create more freedom from these unhealthy patterns that you may be coping with in your life.

This topic is part of this wider approach that we take to wellness here at Solluna, which is food, body, emotional wellbeing, and spiritual growth. It’s important that we don’t obsess and focus on one cornerstone, which was definitely a strategy for me, controlling food and body and finding so-called success there because I didn’t really feel good mentally and emotionally, through my teenage years. As I look back, I felt isolated and neglected and I didn’t feel the type of security, safety and support that I wanted to feel.

It really impacts our lives, creating reactive inflammation in our bodies and reducing our sense of feeling light and free in our lives. Everything is interrelated and it helps to open up your entire body so you feel less stress and have less reactivity so that your nervous system starts to calm down. There’s so much around this subject and I really look forward to shedding some light and supporting you so you can start living a more manageable and vibrant life.

Have you been wondering about this very topic? If you want to know the answer to this question and 3 more sent in by Beauties just like you, listen now to find out!

Remember you can submit your questions at https://mysolluna.com/askkimberly/

[Questions Answered]

Jessica – Delaware   

I have PTSD and not sure I can ever reach the true self that I see you speaking of on Instagram. Can you share your thoughts? As I would love to purchase your book if you think it will help.

Bethany – London 

How much does the body hold onto stress from our past and can our body recover?

Poppy – Australia 

I feel like I’m layering trauma with more trauma. I find myself being in relationship after relationship with men that are not healthy for me. Am I really doing this to myself? I need help in stopping this abusive cycle. :(

Amelia – CA

I’ve read articles on depression and PTSD and trauma and would love to know how to cope so that I can feel better about my life rather than hating it. Can you share some suggestions Kimberly? Huge thanks!

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Transcript:

Note: The following is the output of transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate. This is due to inaudible passages or transcription errors. It is posted as an aid, but should not be treated as an authoritative record.

Kimberly: 00:01 Hi loves and welcome back to our Thursday, Q&A community show where all these questions come right from members of our beautiful, incredible community. Just like you, our topic this week is Healthy Tips for Managing Trauma so You Can Live in the True Self. So this is a really big show and trauma, such a big complex topic that I wanna just say right off the top of the bat, that if you’re struggling, if you’re not sure about, you know, the, the depth of your, of your trauma, unhealthy patterns, it is recommended to go see a professional, a therapist, a psychologist, you know, a, a help professional help, and this show in no way replaces that. So I just wanna say, you know, disclaimer, here, trauma’s a big thing you might, you know, definitely be a needing of professional help. That being said, I have been delving into this topic for the past few years, and I definitely today on the show, wanna share ways that I have been able to move through unhealthy patterns in my life.

Kimberly: 01:07 And I wouldn’t have used the word trauma to describe myself up until a few years ago. The more I started reading about this topic and I started working and talking to trauma experts. And I just wanna, uh, point out a couple things before we get into the show here, the first is the definition of trauma by the American psychological association. And the way they define it is that trauma is an emotional response to an event such as an accident rape or natural disaster immediately after the event, shock and denial are typical. Long-term reactions include unpredictable emotions, flashbacks, strange relationships, and even physical symptoms like headache or nausea.

Kimberly: 01:56 And then it goes on to say, or the author of this book, who is Dr. Karol Darsa, who specializes in trauma, says that trauma can leave you feeling powerless, helpless, and paralyzed. It tends to be sudden and overwhelming. It can own own you. And so we’re gonna talk about the different types of trauma on the show today, but what’s really interesting is there’s something called relational trauma. And this is the type of trauma that is the least understood. And the most powerful relation to tra relational trauma might stem from the loss of a loved one, having an emotionally absent parent or being raised by an abusive narcissistic aggressive family member can also create trauma. And then she goes on to say, which was really interesting to me that a child who has been neglected can in fact suffer more from emotional symptoms than a rape victim.

Kimberly: 02:58 And then she’s quoting VanDerKolk another author who’s who explains the impact of neglect or abandonment is greater than sexual abuse. Children who do not have healthy attachments have been shown to be more vulnerable to stress. So VanDerKolk is the author of the book. The body keeps the score, which is another really wonderful book that I recommend. So I say this at the top of the show to, to shed light on the fact that trauma, which again, creates unhealthy patterns, emotional responses into adulthood and into our life is wider than what we used to think. Or I used to think it was, which was, you know, car accident, victims, rape victims. Of course, that’s a part of, that’s a kind of trauma, but also simply not being seen, heard some level of neglect or emotionally absent in the childhood can also lead to trauma. And that is the type of trauma that I have personally experienced.

Kimberly: 03:53 I have wonderful parents. They love me so much. I love them so much, but there was a host when I was younger and there was, you know, working a lot and trying to provide, and the emotional support wasn’t there when I was a child. So as I’ve learned this with awareness and without resentment, I’ve been able to heal so much and create so much more freedom in my life. So I do wanna shed light on this topic. And so we can delve into it and see how you can create more freedom from these patterns in, you know, potentially, um, unhealthy patterns in your life. And what that does is everything is interrelated. So it just helps to open up your entire body. You feel, you know, as vendor Colca saying here, there’s, there’s less stress, there’s less reactivity. Your nervous system starts to calm down.

Kimberly: 04:45 And this does have an effect on your hormones, on your endocrine system and all these really delicate glands and your immunity, your gut health, even everything is related in a, in a larger systemic way. So shedding light on this topic is, is really important. It’s really complex. So I’ll say again, I am not a trauma expert per se, but as someone that has experienced trauma and has created tools and strategies, and also talking to different trauma experts, and we will link to them in the show notes, including Dr. Carol, Darsa the author of the trauma map who came on this podcast a couple months ago. So that podcast in particular, I recommend that you listen to in conjunction with this one. All right, before we dive, even in even deeper, let’s take a moment to, um, do our little reminders here. I was already in the flow, but pulling back a little bit just for the reminders.

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Kimberly: 05:46 Yes. First of all, please do leave us a review on iTunes, which is such a great way to support the show. It just keeps the show going. It keeps the, the show free and accessible to all. So please be sure to just leave a review. It’s so easy you guys, and it’s amazing. So thank you so much from the bottom of my heart. Please be sure to also subscribe to this show, that way you don’t miss out on any of these Q&A podcasts or our Monday interviews, and also be sure to share the show that’s part of community that’s part of, of, you know, I think while we’re here, our purpose is to share, to serve, to help our brothers and sisters along on the journey, and that creates more fulfillment and peace in our lives. So we also benefit. So if you can think of anyone who would benefit from our show, it could be a neighbor or loved one, whoever please pay has to show onto them. And in that way, we continue to connect and spread the love.

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Kimberly: 06:44 And the last little announcement I have is that our new book is out also our community book. It doesn’t really feel like my book. It is called You Are More More Than You Think You Are – Practical Enlightenment For Everyday Life . And if you’ve been cur curious about it, or you’ve heard me talk about it today is the day. I think I believe a wonderful day to check it out for yourself. It’s, you know, I think it’s discounted now, like 30% on Amazon for the hard copies. And I believe hay house is doing a spec this month for the ebook, which is only 1 99, $1 and 99 cents. So check it out. If you have heard of it, you haven’t gone there yet. I promise you, you will get something out of it. It’s from my heart. It’s my full playbook for living your most abundant, creative, peaceful, joyful life.

Kimberly: 07:37 It’s very specific. It’s very pro. And once you do check it out for that as well, please leave us a review on iTunes, which is so easy as well. You can screenshot it and head over to mysolluna.com, where we will, if you upload your, uh, picture of your review, we will send you our surviving self-doubt kit, which includes rest meditations tools and more for free. So check it out. Now it’s a wonderful offering. And from the bottom of my heart, can’t wait for you to read and benefit. All right?

Q&A Show: Healthy Tips for Managing Trauma so You Can Live in the True Self

Kimberly: 07:37 All of that being said, let’s get into our show today. Healthy tips for managing trauma. So you can live in the true self. So again, this is a really big topic, and it’s part of this wider approach that we take to wellness here, which is food body, emotional wellbeing, and spiritual growth.

Kimberly: 08:37 And it’s so important that we don’t cover things up. We don’t just obsess and focus on one cornerstone, which was definitely a strategy for me, food and body controlling it, finding, you know, so-called success there because I didn’t really feel good mentally and emotionally, you know, through my teenage years, as I look back, I did feel isolation. I did feel neglect and I didn’t feel, um, you know, the type of security and safety and support that I wanted to feel. So it’s important that we, that we really look at, look at this topic, which again can range from severe and chronic. And we definitely wanna get professional help to some other forms of trauma, which maybe we’ve been living with for our whole life. And it’s been impacting our lives, literally creating reactivity inflammation in our bodies and just, um, reducing our sense of feeling light and free in our lives.

Kimberly: 09:49 So I want to, first of all, discuss different types of trauma and that we’ll get into our questions today. So the first is relational trauma, which I mentioned at the top of the show. And I wanna mention this first because it is, in some ways it can be more subtle, you know, like maybe you weren’t beaten or you didn’t get in a car accident, but it does relate to emotional absence, neglect a parent that, you know, may have been narcissistic aggressive, abusive, or in other, in other ways, unhealthy, um, patterns from your caretakers in childhood, the next kind trauma is medical trauma. So the impact of life changing medical diagnosis, of course, such as cancer, physical trauma. So car evidence falls other extreme measures that can result in flashbacks, natural disasters. So being part of a pandemic, an earthquake flood hurricane, so on and so forth, acts of violence, assault, crime, rape robbery, military service.

Kimberly: 10:57 So this is post-traumatic stress syndrome and other, um, sorts of traumatic incidences that can occur from serving in the military and racial trauma, which is the mental, emotional injury caused by racial bias, ethnic discrimination, racism, and health crimes. So according to the research of clinical psychiatrist, Bessel, or col, I mentioned 75% of Americans suffer from some type of post traumatic experience, 75%. So if you’re listening to this and you can sort of, you know, do a, a survey of your life and, and think of about, huh, where if any of these, you know, where does trauma play out in my life potentially from one of these categories? So it’s just something to intersect around and to, you know, just sit with, for me again, I would never have used the word trauma up until about four years ago, which is when I started to really take a deep dive.

Kimberly: 12:08 I started to really look at myself. This is when my mom passed away. This is when I, I became a single mom and I really took a deep dive. And I looked at my patterns. I looked at my life, I looked at what I was, you know, creating and what I wanted to create. And it’s when I started to learn more about mental patterns and emotional patterns. And I started to realize that, huh, I have experienced. And with that came the shedding of, you know, different ways of isolation and shame because certain things and patterns were playing out that I didn’t feel good about. You know, just feeling, um, some separation from people feeling reactive to things, ill and patient, you know, whatever was inside of me. And then when I started to understand that, oh, this, these are trauma responses. It’s not your fault.

Kimberly: 13:03 You’re still a good person, but you have been affected by trauma. I realized that it was about awareness, understanding, and tools to move forward, consciously, make choices, not from the wounded place, but from the, you know, the highest place of consciousness and letting myself, allowing myself the space and the understanding to heal that trauma, which has reduced reactivity, which has definitely increased joy and peace in my life. Stress has gone down my body. Isn’t beat up at the end of the day. I don’t reach for my go-to food cravings, the same ways. It just creates more freedom across the board. And so we realize that we do have these PA the power to shift our lives. It’s just that perhaps we need more awareness and more tools. And so it’s not that you’re, you know what I used to think of myself, oh, you’re just an impatient, or you’re a bad person.

Kimberly: 13:59 Or, you know, you have issues or whatever it is, it’s that, oh, things have happened. And I need to have, I need, I need to learn about this and create some more self love and self-compassion and healing around it. And so this is so important. And so let’s delve into our are questions now. And we see that, oh, you know, the members of our community are like member of mirrors that reflect back to us, perhaps some areas of blind spots or shadows that we can learn from and see how this can apply to our lives perhaps or loved ones.

Question #1 around the topic of: Healthy Tips for Managing Trauma so You Can Live in the True Self: I have PTSD and not sure I can ever reach the true self that I see you speaking of on Instagram. Can you share your thoughts? As I would love to purchase your book if you think it will help.

Kimberly: 13:59 So the first question comes from Jessica who lives in Delaware. Thank you so much. My love for being part of our community. Thank you for submitting a question today and you write, I have PTSD and I am not sure I can ever reach the true self that I see you speaking of on Instagram.

Kimberly: 14:51 Can you share your thoughts as I would love to purchase your book, if you think it will help. So, Jessica, first of all, P PTs G is a very serious thing. And I definitely recommend, you know, perhaps seeing prof, you know, professional help. Um, as I have mentioned at the beginning of the show, so that being said, and a whole other topic there for you to explore. Secondly, I do believe your book can help because I believe that in conjunction with any sort of mental, emotional support that we get the spiritual cornerstone, which is about connecting to your true self underneath the behavior, underneath the pain, underneath the reactions, finding this sanctuary, this resource inside of you, oh, I can breathe. I’m stable, I’m calm. I’m non reactive here, right? Finding that in yourself is the greatest, greatest tool above all else I believe. Or, you know, in the beginning when there’s, you know, chronic symptoms, of course, with professional help, I’ll say in conjunction with everything else because that amplifies everything.

Kimberly: 16:02 I believe it compliments everything. So it gives you for me when I started to see the trauma and that I was identified with it. And part of my trauma, a response was wanting to be seen and heard so desperately. The perfectionism came from that, the overachieving, the fixation with being smart in my grades and my rank in class, all of that was a derivation, so to speak. So for me though, the path to healing involved myself, to not identify with that anymore. So it meant I needed to find ways to disconnect from identifying with the patterns I needed to find breath. I needed to find space and my spiritual practice of journaling and meditation and introspection, and being in nature and the writing per practices, everything that I share in the new book, Jessica, you are more than you think you are, was an enormous part of my healing. And I’m really passionate about sharing that. I also wanna share a quote here from Dr. Carol Darsa from the book. I mentioned the, the, the trauma map where she writes to heal the past. You need to stay focused in the present. The crucial, most people believe that trauma work means working through past memories, but this is not the only way to move on from the past. The crucial component of healing from the past is being in the present moment and rebuilding your release with yourself.

Kimberly: 17:39 So I do recommend this book as well. Um, Jessica, because you know what, what she’s talking about here as well is tools for coming back to your mind and your body in this moment, and that you are more than you think you are, but compliments that as well. So some of the tools that, you know, I talk about that Dr. Carol talks about that other trauma experts talk about is really using your body to, to, to know that you’re safe in this moment and to stay with your breath until some of these re activities pass, you know, for, for, you know, PTs D whole other category of super intense physical reactions. Of course, for me, it was, uh, that feeling of my heart racing, my a drop in my belly when I like someone was triggering my wounds of not being, feeling, not lovable or not being seen and heard.

Kimberly: 18:35 So for me, one of the most powerful tools was staying in my body, feeling the bottoms of my feet, just staying with my breath until it reregulated and really learning the difference between thoughts and feelings. So thoughts would keep me in that pattern. Oh yeah. Like the justifications, all this person shouldn’t have been so late to the call and this person shouldn’t have interrupted me whatever it is. So instead of reliving the thoughts of, oh, this happened in this, I really had to learn Jessica. And I, I, you know, I, I recommend this as well feeling in your body, just feeling the act tools, sensations, the rise and fall of your body’s physical reactions and staying with that until they reregulate, until you open your mouth and say something or speak or act really allowing yourself the space to let your body start to calm down. But again, please check out those other tools, resources, books. I mentioned to help you, um, go further in your healing journey. I’m with you sister, I’m rooting for you. Please keep in touch with me and let me know how you, how you go, how you progress and how we can continue to support you. So thank you so much. My love and sending you big virtual hug.

Question #2 around the topic of: Healthy Tips for Managing Trauma so You Can Live in the True Self: How much does the body hold onto stress from our past and can our body recover?

Kimberly: 19:51 All right. And our next question comes from Bethany, who lives in London. Hello, my British beauty, sending you so much love there across the ocean, big virtual hug. You write, how much does the body hold onto stress from our past, and can our bodies recover? So the more I go into this work, Bethany, I realize that our bodies have cellular memory, and there’s more research, more science coming out to support this, but it is true that whatever happened in our past the trauma in micro and macro ways does create that cellular memory, the, the holding in the body from the past. And again, and I can speak from my own personal experience that I worked in different layers to release my trauma, my neglect, my feelings of limiting beliefs. You’re not lovable. You know, you’re not worthy of being seen and heard the way that I healed was number one, mentally, I could step back and say, oh, I’m an adult.

Kimberly: 21:03 Let me process this more from an adult, you know, back and see that, oh, it wasn’t that they didn’t love me. They didn’t wanna neglect me. It’s that I was, they were hustling. They were trying to work and create abundance for us and, and provide my mother was an immigrant from the Philippines. And she came in her twenties and she came from, you know, essentially, you know, borderline poverty. And so this was her way of showing love. So the mental part of me could digest that, but then there was the, the trapped cellular memories inside of me. And so one of the things that I, that I did was I had to feel in my body. So this was a practice that I would do. Anytime something would come up, I would sit in my body and I would watch the energy. I would just watch it.

Kimberly: 21:59 So it would feel like, Ugh, tightening tightness. A lot of my trauma lived in my belly, which is why I think I had a lifelong, you know, lifelong issues with IBS and chronic constipation and also of things. The energy was I would hold it there. So I started to just sit with my body. And this is part of the work of Dr. David Hawkin. So I’ve talked about many times his book letting go is also very powerful. I would sit with my body for five, 10 minutes at a time, and I would just follow the energy until it completed itself. And there are trauma experts that talk about this too. Digesting feel like so emotion means an energy and motion, and the reason it can, the stress lives in our body is because something happens and we don’t wanna fully feel it, Bethany, it feels dangerous.

Kimberly: 22:46 It feels Ugh, like scary or whatever it is. So we push it down and we try to distract. We try to make ourselves feel happy and light. We move on, but it’s not fully metabolized and digested sort of like metabolizing food. So it’s really important that we sit in our body and we let that energy carry through until it’s, until it’s released. And so I would, the practice, what I would do Bethany is sit in my body five to 10 minutes for follow that tightness, or that unmetabolized emotional energy until it would feel like it led up and it released. And I would just do that over and over again. And it was often the same sorts of triggers that would cause it. And then over time, it started to feel easier and easier and lighter and lighter. So in this using the body was a very powerful way of recovering from stress and trauma.

Kimberly: 23:39 And I do believe that the body can recover for sure. But again, check out all these resources. I recommend Bethany as well as perhaps talking to a trauma expert, but yes, the body can recover. We can be more and more free. We don’t have to live as prisoners of the past. And I’m a living example of that. And I can say from, you know, I continue to work on myself, of course, and triggers still come up of worse, but the level of freedom, greater freedom I have is, you know, off the charts. So I want that for you as well. So please explore these resources, please explore this topic and let me know how you do my love.

All right. We have two more questions on the such incredible rich important topic. We’ll be back from the break to answer two more, hold tight.

Break

Kimberly: 24:55 All right, loves. We have two more questions for you on this topic of managing trauma. So you can live in the true self. And the true self is our unbounded wild, unique expression in the it’s, where we feel that constant state of love. It’s where we feel just vitality and energy. And we feel excited about life. We feel passionate and unfortunately trauma, which is unhealthy patterns that have come from some sort of past experience. It could be acute. It could be singular. It could be one incident, or it could be over many years like neglect. It keeps us from expand, uh, really feeling and experiencing that unbounded freedom, but freedom is possible. And I am so excited to even delve into this topic and to open up the door for you to explore it for yourself. And as I mentioned at the top of the show, I’m not a trauma expert myself, but I have been through it.

Kimberly: 25:56 I have lots of tips that have helped me that I’m sharing on the show as well as books that we will link to in the show notes, trauma experts, more tools and resources. And I wanna, I want to reiterate the research that, um, Bessel Vander Kolk mentioned again at the top of the show that he estimates 75% of Americans are impacted by trauma in some way. So three outta four of us, that’s a huge number, right? Huge, huge, huge number.

Question #3 around the topic of: Healthy Tips for Managing Trauma so You Can Live in the True Self: I feel like I’m layering trauma with more trauma. I find myself being in relationship after relationship with men that are not healthy for me. Am I really doing this to myself? I need help in stopping this abusive cycle. :(

So something to really shine a light out on, let’s get into our next questions here. My loves first one back comes from Poppy who lives in Australia and she writes, first of all, thank you. My Australian love so much love to you down in Oz and wherever you are, maybe you’re in Camberra or, um, Kens or Melbourne or Sydney. I’ve been all around the place there.

Kimberly: 26:56 And I send you love whichever part of that beautiful country you are in you. Right? I feel like I’m layering trauma with more trauma. I find myself being in relationship after relationship with men that are not healthy for me. Am I really doing this to myself? I need help in stopping this abusive cycle. Thank you so much, poppy, for raising this, this, this question. It’s such an important one. And what this gets to the heart of truly is that if you are wondering right now, Hmm, I wonder if trauma is playing out in my life. All you have to do is look at your life because your life really is a mirror of your interstate in many different ways. So if you do have any sort of unhealthy relationship patterns, it could be with your personal relationships, your romantic relationships, your work relationships, whatever it is, the common denominator is is you at the heart of it.

Kimberly: 27:55 It’s something to look at, right? It’s not something to create shame about. It’s not something to feel bad about, but just to say, huh, there’s something in me that needs to be looked at and asked. And I can say that this did not come to light for a long time for me, but a lot of my relationships were unhealthy and they were with amazing people. But as I look back, a lot of these relationships were safe in some way. So I wasn’t experiencing the full unbounded, you know, expansiveness. I was feeling like, oh, you know, this person’s like my, my safety, um, my just, you know, closeness, the best friend, whatever it is, but what it was when I started to heal the trauma, I realized that, oh, I, you know, I was trying to keep the world, my world safe and trying to control things because of that trauma, because of not feeling safe in my childhood.

Kimberly: 29:01 So when I healed that, oh, like I found this new sense of wholeness inside of me. It meant that it opened the door poppy for the healthy relationships, healthy relationships to come in. And primarily I’m talking about first and foremost, foremost, my incredible soulmate husband, John, I could not love him more. I love him more. Every day, our connection grows and grows. It is whew. Most mind blowing, fulfilling relationship that I did not know was possible for me. I had to heal myself first. I had to find the wholeness poppy. So in the new book, you are more than you think you are really important chapter for you to read is you are whole, it is chapter three. I read this chapter, still myself. I work on this, I do that sun moon practice because in finding our own wholeness, we heal and then all relationships outside of us heal.

Kimberly: 29:57 And I will mention again, from the cornerstone perspective, that was ultimately how I really healed my relationship with food. It had to come from the inside. So I definitely recommend taking a look inside, checking out the other resources that I mentioned, but check out that you are whole chapter puppy. You don’t have to keep playing out this pattern. You can really healthy relation or really healthy relationship or relationships in your life. It just takes some introspection. It takes turning the mirror inside, breathing through it. You can do it. You’re strong enough to do it. You know, if you need support, help call on that as well. And I’ll also say that this sort of work and introspection take a deep dive in, in our Solluna Circle. So if you’re interested in that, it’s a beautiful community of like-minded people. And we support each other to, to take this deep dive and to go through the journal prompts and the daily prompts of looking at this topic. And I really do recommend that. So let me know how you do love. Thank you so much for being part of our community and sending you so much love.

Question #4 around the topic of: Healthy Tips for Managing Trauma so You Can Live in the True Self: I’ve read articles on depression and PTSD and trauma and would love to know how to cope so that I can feel better about my life rather than hating it. Can you share some suggestions Kimberly? Huge thanks!

Kimberly: 31:07 All right, our next and final question comes from Amelia who lives in California. Thank you. My love so much for your question, your vulnerability, my Californian neighbor, and you write, I’ve read articles and depression and PTSD and trauma, and will love to know how to cope so that I can feel better about my life rather than hating it. Can you share some suggestions, Kimberly huge help. So Amelia, thank you so much again for this. I think anytime we’re curious about a topic, we start reading online, we start looking at articles and such so on, so on and so forth. There’s a message there. We’re being drawn towards something because we know that something inside of us aligns to that or needs healing in that way. So first of all, Amelia, I wanna acknowledge you and congratulate you for being intuitive and shedding light on this potentially really important topic in your own life to heal, to, to reawaken, to open up more freedom and to move forward in your life.

Kimberly: 32:12 So for me, and of course, you know, it goes without saying, but all the prior tools and tips that I’ve mentioned apply here as well. For me, the first step was just recognizing that there was trauma, that there was unhealthy really patterns. It wasn’t that I was a bad person. It wasn’t that I didn’t have enough willpower, but there were things that happened that, you know, when were not processed in a healthy way, it was as simple as that. So we removed the stigma, we removed the shame we remove, you know, all the labels. And we just say, Hey, there’s something here that needs to be healed. That was the biggest first part for me, Amelia was really recognizing that this was at play in my life. This does apply to me again. If 75 of people are experiencing this, we all just need to take a look and say, yes, it applies or not.

Kimberly: 33:04 The second part was noticing how it played out in my present life. So how the past was alive right here and right now. So again, as Dr Darsa mentions and these other trauma experts, it’s about being, you know, here in this present moment with your breath, with your body and really communicating the message to yourself, I’m safe. I’m here. I don’t have to live out this pattern. Safety and security is here right now. So for me, the healing entailed, seeing patterns. Journaling was a huge part of this writing things down. Introspecting sort of digging underneath again, a lot of these practices and tools. I also go through in the new book, but seeing what was underneath that, why did that person bother me so much? What was it about that conversation or that personality? And then we can start to see a through line. We can start to see the pattern, and once you start to see, oh, underneath, this was me just not feeling good enough or not feeling loved or not feeling hurt, whatever it was.

Kimberly: 34:13 Then it was starting to unlock that hold, that trauma has on our lives. And then I started to go into that body work. I mentioned earlier sitting and letting myself reregulate until I moved forward into speaking. So I was creating less of a mess and my outward external life by noticing that I had to reregulate internally before I let my trauma play out, because once it goes to the world, you know, it’s just more of a mess. It’s more energy to clean things up. It, you know, it starts to drag things down in our lives. So those were some of the things that I really had to go through in finding my wholeness. Again, all these tools, the new book, Amelia, the free meditations that we put out, the practical enlightenment meditation, the self-connection, which will allow us to breathe and find some space.

Kimberly: 35:08 We can take our breath with us as we go into these deep feelings, right? But again, if you’ve experienced severe trauma, you definitely wanna get professional help to make sure that it’s, you know, you’re creating safety and sometimes it’s progressively going into healing, right? It’s in the nonlinear path. And so that may be warranted for you. Definitely Amelia. We will list many resources as well, including some podcasts where we talked about depression and of course trauma, and some of the incredible neuroscientists we’ve had in here, including Dr. Caroline leaf, who also talks about creating new thought patterns, wonderful podcasts that compliments this one as well. So please, please, please be sure to check out the show notes is mysolluna.com.

Thought of the Week

Kimberly: Now, before we go, I wanna leave our quote of the week. So thank you so much, Amelia, please keep in touch with me, sending you a big hug. Let me know how you do our quote of the week comes from page 109 of our new book. And I write, or I, well, I, um, quote, sorry. This quote comes from Paramahansa Yogananda inside of the book and I quote him as saying, “You don’t have to acquire anything; you have it already. The gold of the soul is right there within you, covered with the mud of delusion. All you have to do is scrape off that mud.”

Kimberly: 36:41 The mud is the trauma. The fear, the mind chatter underneath that you are not broken. You are not in need of fixing per se. It’s just removing these layers that have been, you know, put on you so to speak. So we remove the layers and then the underneath the true self beautiful, unlimited potential and energy starts to rise up, come through you and live in your life as the true self with unfettered freedom. So remember that freedom is possible. You do not have to live a life of trauma help. Is there support? Is there, ah, so please check out the resources I am here for you now, and always, please keep your questions coming. Please keep in touch with me. I’ll be back here Monday for our next interview podcast to then take great care. Keep in touch with me on social as well at underscore Kimberly Snyder, check out the new book, check out our amazing gut supportive products, which definitely help with peace and moods, our Solluna products and more. We have so many offerings, the meditations, the Solluna Circle. I love you very much. I’m so grateful for you and our sacred connection. See you back here soon. Lots of love.

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