Digital Wellness: Why Social Media Damages your Emotional Wellbeing [Episode #684]

This week’s topic is: Digital Wellness: Why Social Media Damages your Emotional Wellbeing

We live in this modern world where we must adapt. We must have tools to really protect ourselves because there is this constant flux of stimulation, information, images and all sorts of things coming at us. And this isn’t something that was a concern to our grandparents, for instance.

Right here, right now, we need to look at our total holistic lifestyle and really make some shifts to continue to elevate our wellbeing. And today we’re focusing on emotional wellbeing and this is such an important part of wellness that can often be overlooked because it’s not something that we can pick up or touch or see necessarily.

Many researchers are coming out now, including Dr. Gabor Mate who found actual research on how emotional stress contributes to physical illness and things like autoimmune and/or immune conditions lowered immunity because our nervous systems reactivity is lowering our immunity. It also affects our glandular system and our endocrine system. So wellness is not just about the physical body or about physical food.

I’m very excited to talk about this very important topic today, which unfortunately has a detrimental effect on so many of us, if we don’t watch it. And we don’t put in some really healthy boundaries

Have you been wondering about this very topic? If you want to know the answer to this question sent in by a Beauty just like you, listen now to find out!

Remember you can submit your questions at https://mysolluna.com/askkimberly/

[Question Answered]

Sarah – New York (Emotional Well Being Cornerstone)

Hello Kimberly, I follow your Instagram and love it, but I struggle with my own Instagram and social media to the point where it affects my moods and day. I don’t want to stop posting completely but what can I do to have a healthier mindset with it?

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Transcript:

Note: The following is the output of transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate. This is due to inaudible passages or transcription errors. It is posted as an aid, but should not be treated as an authoritative record.

Kimberly: 00:01 Hi, loves and welcome back to our Thursday Q&A podcast where our focus this week is on our third cornerstone emotional wellbeing. And our topic this week is Digital Wellness: Why Social Media Damages your Emotional Wellbeing. So we live in this world, this modern world, where we must adapt. We must have tools to really protect ourselves because there is this constant flux of stimulation and information and images and all sorts of things coming at us. And this isn’t something that was a concern to our grandparents, for instance. So right here, right now, we need to look at our total holistic lifestyle and really make some shifts to continue to elevate our wellbeing. And today we’re focusing on emotional wellbeing and this is such an important part of wellness that can often be overlooked because it’s not something that we can pick up or touch or see necessarily.

Kimberly: 01:06 But so many researchers are coming out now, including Dr. Gabor Mate talking about or finding in actual research, how emotional stress contributes to physical illness and also to things like autoimmune conditions and immune Condit lowered immunity because our nervous system, this reactivity all the time is lowering our immunity. It also affects our glandular system and our endocrine system. So wellness is not just about the physical body. It’s not just about the physical food. So I’m very excited to talk about this very important topic today, which unfortunately has a detrimental effect on so many of us, if we don’t watch it. And we don’t put in some really healthy boundaries and tools.

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Kimberly: 02:11 Before we dive in, I just want to remind you to please leave us a review on iTunes or wherever you listen to our podcast. It’s such a beautiful way to support the show. It’s that energy feedback. It helps other beautiful souls like yourself. Find the show. So thank you so much in advance. It could literally be one sentence and it’s wonderful. Please also subscribe to our show and that way you don’t miss out on any of these key topics and our wonderful interviews on Mondays or our solocast, where we go deeper into a particular aspect of lifestyle and wellness. And lastly, please be sure to share our show with anyone that you think would benefit. This is part of the generosity of the heart that’s talked about in Buddhism and other philosophies is really sharing resources. And that’s really been such a big part of my philosophy from the start.

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Kimberly: 02:58 When had my free blog. It really came from this pure place of sharing, and I think it just elevates our own health and our own wellbeing. So if you can think of anybody at all, that would benefit from the show, it could be a friend or a neighbor, whatever. Please be sure to share our show with them and share the love on my last, last little announcement here is that the new book, baby, You Are More More Than You Think You Are – Practical Enlightenment For Everyday Life, is out in the world now. So please be sure to pick up a copy for your own benefit. Ooh, this one is right from my heart and it really comes from that pure place of wanting to share the highest and best teachings and practices that have made a profound difference in me being able to create a life that is really fulfilling to me, I’ve been able to create a lot more peace, a lot more success, a lot more happiness. And so it’s a very practical guide for you being able to do the same in your life. I believe we’re all powerful. I believe we all have a purpose. That’s why we are here and we want to tap into our potential. And so this book will very much help you do that. All right.

Question on: Digital Wellness: Why Social Media Damages your Emotional Wellbeing

Kimberly: 03:51 So all of that being said, let’s get right into our show today, our format. I’ll just say this for a few more weeks until you get used to it is one core poignant question, and then I’ll give some really practical takeaway tips. And then as always, we will end with the quote of the week. So this question comes from Sarah, who lives in New York. Hello, my love, I was a new Yorker myself for many years. So whatever borough you’re in, wherever you are from wherever you live specifically, sending you lots and lots of love out there and what can be, what is a wonderful place, but can definitely be a very noisy place as well.

Kimberly: 04:54 So I hope you’re getting some time to get outside into those parks and get out to the, to the ocean and just get some fresh air. Your question is, hello, Kimberly, I follow your Instagram and I love it, but I struggle with my own Instagram and social media to the point where it affects my moods and my day, I don’t wanna stop posting completely, but what can I do to get a healthier mindset around it? So this is a really, really big one. As I mentioned at the top of our show, because we live in this world where these apps are on our phones. And so there isn’t this space where most of us have our phones with us all the time. And so someone told me, or I read somewhere that the average person on Instagram is checking the app 36 times a day. And as of 2022, the average daily social media use worldwide was 147 minutes

Kimberly: 05:56 Per day. This is a bit frightening considering that there is research. Now showing that seven minutes on Instagram, which by the way, was ranked to be the most negative on mental health of all of the social media apps, seven minutes a day contributes to a decline in mental health. And there are so many studies around this, you know, mental health, um, specifically with body image concerns, self-esteem concerns, social anxiety, eating disorders, a desire for plastic surgery and more so we will link to all some more studies. I mean, I just took a little bit of a dive and it was actually quite frightening what they’re finding out more now and now, uh, just more deeply about what is going on with social media. The other big issue that I find is that if we’re always thinking about what to post, and then we’re always looking for that validation outside of ourselves, which is the ego, right’s the external, which is fleeting and it’s temporary meaning, oh, look at how many people liked my post and look at how many likes I got or, you know, whatever the comments we’ve given our Powerway in a couple ways.

Kimberly: 07:25 Number one, we start to crave more and more of that Val validation outside of ourselves. And it starts to weaken our deep connection to the true self, which is that our worth is not up for grabs. Our worth does not shift and change with what’s based with what’s going on outside of us. Our worth is intact, no matter what’s going on in the external world, but when we’re constantly on the apps, we lose sight of that and we can get sucked into this world and we become very vulnerable to that. The other big concern I see is that people aren’t really present in their lives instead of just enjoying a party or a moment with friends. It becomes all about the picture and taking this perfect picture over, you know, many pictures over and over again, until you get the perfect one or the perfect selfie, whatever it is, and then posting it in the middle of a, you know, it could be a really joyful experience and then checking to see what the feedback was. And so you can see the drain, the true energetic drain of all of this and our lives. And it’s really, really important that we do create healthy boundaries because we have to make a choice. Do I wanna have peace joy fulfillment in my life, or do I want my life to be overrun with these apps, which pull me into the external world and away from myself all day long.

Kimberly: 08:57 So here is a coup, here are a couple key takeaways that I invite you to contemplate and to integrate into your own life. If they resonate. Number one is first of all, go through all your accounts and do a detox, meaning just make sure that everybody that you’re following is feeling inspiring and joyful. Marie KDO said this about tidying up. It should spark joy. And if something is making you just feel not great, mute it or unfollow it, it’s really important to do that. Clean number two is batching time that you are on social media. And this is really, really important. And I actually just went through this practice with my dad about news. My dad isn’t really on social media, but it’s just like, he’s always like checking the news all the time on his phone and the New York times app and all this stuff.

Kimberly: 09:53 And I said, no, no, it needs to be certain times you’re in there. And certain times where you’re just quiet, create more stillness. So I encourage you to put this in your calendar and you would treat it as an appointment, just like anything else in your life, you know, nine to nine, 20 or 12 to 1230 and, you know, whatever, I’m just making this up four to 4 45. That’s kind of a lot of time, but just like whatever it is, you know, between all of the apps, making it very specific times, turning off alerts and just starting getting to get used to this is a scheduled thing, and it’s not, it’s dribbling into my life all the time, all the time. I also think it’s important. I think, you know, depending on what you’re doing and if you, you know, how involved you are in social media, you may wanna check it in the morning at some point to sort of see what’s going on, but I don’t really see any benefit on checking it late at night before you go to bed.

Kimberly: 10:55 And when you’re about to settle down and go into deep restful sleep or trying to cultivate really good sleep hygiene. So I think a practice of not being on social media at all, let’s say one hour before bed to start, and you could start moving that up every 20 minutes. It’s like two hours before bed, but start with something that feels reasonable and then start moving it forward. And you’ll just become aware of feeling more peaceful and more relaxed with social media in your life. And then it’s just so important to be out of this comparison culture mindset. So for me, I don’t like to be on social media very much. I’ll be honest with you. I’m not on there very much. I plan my content in advance get scheduled. I’m only on there certain times, but for me getting out of comparison culture means I have to be grounded in myself before I go on, which means I

Kimberly: 11:52 Do my own self-connection practices. First I meditate. I drink my hot water with lemon. I take my SBO probiotics, drink the GGS journal, get clarity about my goals and my flow for the day. And then I go on there at some point. I think we’re particularly vulnerable if we get up and you know, we haven’t meditated yet. And we see these work stress emails, like all this stuff is going on. We’re already pulled away from our center. So I encourage you Sarah to go into our, um, app, which is the free Solluna app. And you can check it out for yourself. And the meditations are this method I’ve created called the practical enlightenment meditations. They’re about seven minutes or so they’re guided and it’s all about the, I am peace. The, I am enough, right? It’s about this connecting to you, who you are and the true self.

Kimberly: 12:51 And the more we do that, the less we get pushed around by social media and the external world in general, because we become so much more connected to ourselves. So check out all of those tips. I hope this helps you, Sarah, and all of you Beauties out there. Again, it’s really important that we create healthy boundaries and actual practices and tools in daily life. Otherwise we can just get swept up in the chaos and our mental health and our overall health can profoundly suffer. And that is not what we want is not the point of social media. And then let’s be honest. There’s a lot of darkness there. So it’s up to us to protect our light, to protect our energy and to keep moving forward.

Thought of the Week

I’m gonna end with a quote from the week. And this comes from my one of my favorite chapters in the new book, which is called you are more, you are love. I already said the title of the book. You are more than you think you are. And so this comes from page <affirmative> page 55, and I thought this was so aptly connected to our topic today.

Kimberly: 14:13 They never realized that what they were seeking was inside all along. Some of us think I’m paraphrasing this part. Some of us think it’s going to come from our significant other from family members. Some of us seek fame and the adoration of fans just think of social media, but really you don’t get love from others. It’s just that some people prompt you to feel the love that is already there in you. So the antidote truly for all this noise in

Kimberly: 14:50 Social media, to have a really healthy balance with it and digital wellness is to connect to the love and the validation inside of yourself to realize it does not come from social media. And then also to really have healthy practices for balancing time on it and time off it. So sending you so much love and so much support, keep the questions coming, check out the show notes over at mysolluna.com, where you’ll find links to other podcasts and meditations. I think you would love and articles and all sorts of things. I also just wanted to mention that we are launching Kimberly’s corner, which is me going back to really informal blogging and vlogging, which I did from the start. Just my thoughts and ideas. So look out for that as well. I’m super excited to relaunch that. Go back to my roots as another form of support I can give you. So see you back here on Monday for our next interview podcast to then take great care and sending you so much love.

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